Coaches and teachers are often the first adults to notice when something is wrong, and the least equipped to know what to do about it. That's not a failure. It's a gap we're working to close.
If you believe an athlete is in immediate danger, call 988 or emergency services.
Elite sport culture rewards stoicism and punishes vulnerability. Your athletes have learned, from you, from their peers, from the sport itself, that struggling is something you hide. Changing that culture starts with you making it safe to say something.
Sudden drops in performance without physical explanation. Increased irritability or emotional volatility. Withdrawal from teammates or changes in social behavior. Comments about worthlessness, failure, or not wanting to be here. A sense that something is "off" even if you can't name it. Trust that instinct.
You don't need to be a therapist. You need to be a human. Pull them aside and say: "Hey, I've noticed you seem like you're not yourself lately. I'm not here to talk about your times. I just want to check in." Then listen. You don't have to solve it. You have to start the conversation.
Your job is to notice and refer, not to treat. If an athlete discloses something serious, take it seriously. Contact a school counselor, parent, or mental health professional. If you believe they are in immediate danger, call 988 or emergency services. Document what was said and what steps you took.